Ya know that song? ‘A Rush And A Push And The Land Is Ours’? By the Smiths, ya know? I mean I get it’s about.. PR..I mean those two words rush and push are basically the same except for the first letter of each...which just so happen to not so discretely be..P & R...I mean I get it, to get your music out there you need a promotional campaign...public relations ya know...phew....but like has anyone considered the possibility...that it was a hint?...that Morrissey and Marr would have liked nothing more than for the Canadian power rock trio Rush...to cover that excellent tune Push by The Cure?

What would that sound like?.... I mean maybe that’s what The Smiths were going for in the studio...they say to Stephen Street, ‘we’ve found the formula for a worldwide number one single....we’ve just got to make this song sound like... Canadian power rock trio Rush.. covering Push by The Cure’....and Stephen Street is all “you don’t have to explain who Rush is to me”...huffs off into the drum booth and starts rocking out on those fills from Tom Sawyer...and the Smiths collectively are like ‘alright, I guess we don’t.....but not..Tom Sawyer...like if they were covering Push.. by The Cure’

but I mean also...we’re leaving out the crucial second half of the title...the difficult...second...part of the song name ya know...cause I mean maybe they had some sort of crazy idea for some sort of.. land grab ya know...like the 19th century robber barons.. a bit more difficult to do by the 1980s and..in the pop music world...where land isn’t really the commodity bands deal in or even form to obtain...I mean you can purchase property without ever learning to play the guitar...or what a paradiddle is...I mean I get Dollywood is a real cool place to go but I’m sure that wasn’t Ms. Parton’s sole intention when getting into the game you know

...but whatever their plan, they’re just hiding it out in the open...first track too!...off Strangeways, Here We Come...ya know I had no idea that Strangeways was a prison when I first heard that title...being in America and all, I didn’t realize until years later...I just thought it meant ya know...strange...ways...like bein a little...off-kilter...like so many of us who listened to the Smiths back then seemed to be...

but like hiding it out in the open...maybe if they had toured that album, their plan was to have...’the Canadian power rock trio Rush’...keeping the description, the tour sponsors felt, though I don’t why, I mean Rush were pretty big in the 80s....but the Smiths’ pla...n was to have the Canadian power rock trio Rush..be their opening act...but only playing the song Push by the Cure...

I mean Rush are known for their prog tendencies ya know...I mean maybe not enough to have them be known as ‘the Canadian power prog rock trio Rush’ but nevertheless...they could easily extend that one Cure song to...well a half hour opening set no problem, depends on how much time they’re given, how long the Smiths boys wanna hear this every night...but I’m sure Rush could even jam out on it for a cool 45 if necessary...get Billy Dee Williams up there for some backing vocals...

And Push has that two minute plus instrumental intro..talk about just being a mighty fine pop tune, you know..that you could not have vocals for over a 120 seconds..and still be one of the greatest songs of that decade...

I mean this is all conjecture...I don’t know if it would have extended to touring...but it sounds rad, ya know...I mean Johnny Marr prolly woulda joined them onstage a few times...and like he and Alex Lifeson are both such tasteful players, I doubt it would’ve descended into a..Crossroads-style Macchio and The devil guitar battle...Geddy Lee and Neil Peart just pedalling like an E blues riff to show their distaste as to what it’s all become...but I’m sayin NO! that never woulda happened...cause these guys are such top-notch musicians...

but like Johnny Marr and Alex Lifeson just doubling up the melody lines.......I hesitate to add but, Eddie Van Halen woulda made it even better!...woo!...I mean Eddie doing one of those divebomb whammy bar things to kick in the vocals would be just the thing...I mean if I had produced The Head On The Door, that’s what I woulda done...I mean it was 1985, Roth had just left VH...the world needed something like this!...and Eddie had played the solo on Beat It...why not this next?

alright, I know, I know...you’re all saying ‘what hubris, Young Southpaw!...to try and mess with the pop perfection of The Cure’s Push’...alright! I get you...like when time-travel becomes possible, I won’t try and go back and finagle my way into the studio to suggest adding that to the album.........but I might ..suggest it as a remix!...

but like with or without Eddie Van Halen joining then onstage...it would be rad if Rush and Marr went into a bit of Van Halen...right in the middle of their epic 30 minute version of Push...like I don’t know, just launch inta..woah! Push Comes To Shove of course...Geddy steppin up the mic ‘does it seem cold in here to you?’......Geddy Lee Roth ya know!!!

but then when The Smiths themselves take the stage to play A Rush And A Push And The Land Is Ours...I mean if they’re touring, who’s taking care of this land grab?...I mean it’s an effective cover story to be out on tour when it happens, especially if you’re nowhere near the land you’re grabbing...but wasn’t it that they didn’t really have a management team that led to the Smiths splitting up?...though is that why the album is called Strangeways Here We Come?...now that I know it’s a prison... are they that concerned, worried even, about this land grab?

Though I mean looking at this from a different angle...the Cure are one of the bands that I’ve still never managed to see...and not for lack of trying too...just hasn’t happened yet...and they play for like 3, 3 and a half hours, I mean you can’t play that long without including a couple of Rush covers I would imagine...I mean I wonder which ones they do...’Limelight’ maybe....the Cure had that Orange film...green and orange ya know...secondary colours...that makes sense...I mean I’d love to hear them do YYZ...and again if like you’re watching The Cure, and Geddy Lee, Alex Lifeson, Johnny Marr, and Eddie Van Halen show up...that’s gonna be real rad........I hope that’s not what I’ve been missing, like it happens every night, it’s even written in the tour programme... I better get Cure tickets pronto!...Presto! as Rush would say...

Man, do you think the Smiths will ever get back together though? And I mean how fast would those tickets sell out? And like you know that joke in Mary Poppins - ‘I know a man with a wooden leg named Smith’?...IMAGINE IF THE SMITHS DID GET BACK TOGETHER JUST TO PERFORM THAT SCENE FROM THE MOVIE!....just like a little skit.....that’s it, no songs, nothing else...not even bringing Rush and The Cure onstage for their own version of Push...let alone Eddie Van Halen....but like they could have an encore too because the joke is repeated later on when Michael, the son you know, tells it to the bankers. I mean I’d pay money to see that you know...especially if they did manage that land grab and were performing it on their own turf....much like Dollywood...they’ve got a theatre going on the property, it’s like a desination gig thang...they only have to work like...I mean those two scenes can’t be more than 10 minutes tops...throw in getting to the venue and whatnot...work like a half hour a day for a whole summer season...just rake in the dough...heck, get enough to buy more land...set The Cure up with their own residency...doing all Rush covers somewhere