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Hopscotch To Heaven

from Hopscotch To Heaven by Young Southpaw

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lyrics

It’s like table tennis you know... I mean you’re not playing ...with actual tables......

hitting em back and forth.....I mean..I can’t imagine..well maybe they do make rackets strong enough to hit a - but that’s a lotta..... you gotta put a lot inta your swing to hit a...unless they’re like miniature tables you know...

instead a balls.....

but I figure, you say table tennis I picture like actual literal furniture...

I mean nothin’ crazy like a banquet table... I mean that wouldn’t even fit on a court...really.......

unless that was what they use as the net, you know.....

but just like a regular table, seats four.... or six...
two..... two goin’....the long, longer ways..... and then one on each end...
or maybe just a square ya know...

like an even-numbered family .........imagine if they had a son named Steven.........but woah!...what if he was an only child!

I’m not, I’m not sayin’ families have to be four people, I’m just thinkin’...

cause like, regardless of how many members... there’s always a power struggle ya know... the children expected to obey the parents, who have their own internal dynamics.. but a square of four you know everyone’s equal...

has that ever happened in the history of the universe?.... Have there ever been squares?!....

Is square just like a concept that we aspire to? L7 ya know...how did that band eat?!...

Or do we even aspire to it, what with all the inequality runnin rampant and everyone out to get everybody else?..... tryin’ to get ahead themselves, just lookin’ out for number one...

there are no number ones in squares...I mean the square root of one is one...all for one ya know...this is like the I in team of shapes...

well I mean you could write a literal number one inside a square, I, don’t get me wrong, I’m sure anyone can do that.......

I don’t know why you would......startin’ a hopscotch game or something..and therein lies the power struggle...everyone out playin’ hopscotch when others be wantin’ dinner...
or worse yet, hopscotch addicts all standin’ lonely on the street, having just made a square with a number one in it outta some chalk they found washed up in the gutter....

but even in the depths of addiction they don’t wanna appear too desperate so they haven’t drawn out the whole game..........just wanna make it seem all casual when someone walks by, they say ‘oh would you look at this..... looks like someone put a one in a square’...then pausing with what they hope is a casual demeanor...’hey, remember hopscotch?’

this is like the outdoor version of a game of pool ya know...and then like pool balls, they’re round, the number one’s in a circle...on a sphere! .. which you then put into a triangle.. for the break!...... and then pool tables they’re rectangular -rectangle? I nearly killed ‘em –..................

but pool tables man, more proof for this nonexistence of squares idea...and woah pool tables there’s another one.....you can’t swim on it........but I mean is that what the blue green felt of the tabletop is supposed to represent?...... water?.......... bluegreen is more the color of algae............and that, would slow up the progress of the ball...


So yeah, hopscotch man...woo, you got the hops of beer and then scotch as in like...scotch........I mean this is weird for a children’s game, you know...

imagine at the end like a distillery appears..like it’s some sort of magic ritual...well I mean, luckily that has never happ-well I can’t say it’s never happened, I don’t have the records of every hopscotch game ever played in the history of the universe.....
I don’t even have one of those records........ nor have I ever seen any on ebay.....
I mean would it be worth any of our times to go thru such accounts.. or even keep ‘em in the first place?.......
I mean kids often play it by themselves, I doubt any one of them are that meticulous....
though maybe there is like at least one somewhere..some freakin’ genius who’s got it all under control, can make anything appear at the end of the ten..steps..or however many you wanna use...

but I mean Stairway to Heaven, think of all Jimmy Page coulda done with it if it was.. Hopscotch To Heaven..... using the ten squares and all the kabbalistic meanings of the Sephiroth......I mean you don’t usually build your own stairway –
I don’t mean to make sweeping generalizations, but in my life I’ve found that to be true... I’ve never met anyone who has built their own stairs – up or down – I mean people rarely even sweep their own stairs.. to get back to that generalization....
but you do draw your own hopscotch games


but relating this to the kabbalistic Tree Of Life, the ten Sephiroth you know, the one in the square..that I’m havin’ so much trouble gettin’ past...
is like the first one Malchuth you know..the Earth, Kingdom, literal translation there, you get up higher and higher like that Jackie Wilson song....then onta Yesod, Hod, Tiphereth, all them...
and then of course, has anyone ever used 22 steps like the journey of the Tarot...
just hoppin’ thru ‘em like nobody’s business...nobody’s fool, like that Cinderella song....Slade had one too....and woah, Fool In The Rain....wash the hopscotch game right off....no wonder Jimmy Page was so skeptical.....

but The Fool!..tarot card ya know.... he’s got one foot off the cliff already... startin’ his own mystical game a hopscotch..I mean no wonder this is so addictive...
specially if you could just draw 10 squares and then a whole distillery appears at the end...
I mean at that point you’re probably more addicted to the alcohol than the actual game of hopscotch...

though this could also be used for teenagers who still aren’t old enough to go to the bar...circumvent all those drinking laws...though that’s prolly why you never see teenagers playin’ hopscotch......be too suspicious!...
people would know they’re only doing it to get to the distillery...
unless they’ve first learned to make themselves invisible...
but does that mean the distillery would also be invisible?...
you can’t have distilleries just poppin’ into existence from outta nowhere like that...
with no one around...I mean if a distillery appears in the forest and there’s no one there to see it.... does that mean invisible teenagers have conjured it into existence with a playground game?

hooo!

but Hopscotch To Heaven ya know..Highway To Heaven..
imagine if Michael Landon was in an AC/DC cover band...
I mean talk about a bonzanza...
freakin blowin minds all over the place...Shake the Foundations of the entire world, well beyond those of that Little House On The Prairie......
Shake Your Foundations though, that’s a Brian Johnson song..... and ya gotta figure Highway To Hell was a Bon Scott number.... and album...
though maybe combinin’ the two is where his golden goose soars...
Fly On The Wall came out, what, 1985.... Highway To Heaven ran like 84-89, he could be doin’ some Brian Johnson stuff..... I mean he was Michael Landon.... the television star..
he could play any AC/DC songs he wants ya know...
I mean he’d prolly wanna go with Ride On......... ya know that slow one off Dirty Deeds, aw man that’s a tune..perfect soundtrack for those long wagon rides across the prairie you know....

but I mean could you play hopscotch on the prairie?...
imagine a bunch a prairie dogs just throwin’ little stones and then hoppin’ along...so cute, ya know...
but I mean as for the humans...be hard to chalk the high grass like that...
you could spray paint it but spray paint hadn’t been invented yet at the time the show is supposed to be taking place...
though of course it had at the time the show was being made...
I mean what a time to be alive – spray paint and tv’s...imagine spraypainting your tv...
well I guess that would be the logical outcry once you saw that they were using spray paint in Little House On The Prairie.......and you wanna complain about such an egregious anachronism..and rightfully so.....
heck you could even make a game a hopscotch out of it..
show your outrage by lining up ten television sets on their backs and just stomping through their screens after you’re done spray painting them with the numbers one through ten...and like it’s highly unlikely that you’re gonna be the only one...reasonable to expect that your entire neighborhood would just be street after street of smashed and battered television sets.. and roaming disgruntled Little House On The Prairie viewers....
and it was a national show so it would just be community after community stretching from coast to coast, sea to spray painted sea..of carnage

though I mean..this seems like a lot of work to protest something that never happened

credits

from Hopscotch To Heaven, released June 18, 2022
Words by Aug Stone
Music by Rick Webb

Vocals recorded and track mixed by Sam Carlson at Sans Serif Recording, New Haven, CT 2021

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Young Southpaw Connecticut

"From the existential thread that ties Jean-Paul Sartre to Jon Bon Jovi, to the skinny on what’s floating in TLC’s ‘Waterfalls’, and the possibility that Al Pacino is coaching boxing kangaroos in space, wise-fool Southpaw's ramblings lead listeners on a surreal journey through doors they didn't even know existed, into a highly original, deeply funny land of pop culture confusion." - popbollocks ... more

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